My Holiday Bete Noire

Ahh, Christmas Carols. Some love them, some love to hate them. Some are superb others absurd. They are overplayed, re-made, re-mixed and regurgitated every year. There is one Christmas Carol in particular that fits all of the above descriptions and grates on my nerves no matter which way the spin doctors of Christmas music try to polish the message.

It brings the sarcastic Scrooge out in me and my verbal rants spew their dissatisfaction on the piece every time I hear it. When the offending carol plays on the radio it has caused me to fly down the stairs at lighting speed to mute the clatter, with my family's eyes opened wide asking, "what is the matter?"

"Oh, I'm glad you asked, for I'm willing to share why The Little Drummer Boy is the bane of my Christmas Holiday.

My Sentiments Exactly

First, this whole song is an anachronism of great error.  Do you remember a drummer boy in the account of Jesus' birth?

Of course, I know one can write any scenario they want in the great realm of music creativity. We have a gamut of imaginary carols in the whole Holiday music library; Rudolph, Santa, Frosty the Snowman but the Little Drummer Boy sneaks his way into the Greatest Story Ever Told and it chaps my hide.

Let's just be frank here and talk about reality. I'll set the scene just to give a proper backdrop. Mary and Joseph have a baby, they are new parents, sleep is high on their priority list. The new schedule of having a newborn demands, feeding, bathing, hushing, burping and when the sweet baby is finally asleep the parents sigh in relief and are ready for bed themselves.

Along comes the Little Drummer Boy and rat-a-tat-tats his way into their life as a gift. Come on, no parent in their right mind would nod in approval as it says Mary does in the song. If I was Mary I would tell Joseph to go find out what all that racket was and shut it up as quick as possible.

And when Joseph found out the source of the headache creating 'pa rum pum pum pum' pulse beat, he'd be a smart husband and father to pay the poor boy off and tell him to scram.

Now that the anachronism part of the song lyrics are explained let's get to the actual song. I've about had it after the first chorus of 'pa rum pum pum pum.' What kind of writer makes you listen to that over and over again?

How about throwing in a few, 'da, da da dats', or 'crash, bang booms' for the variety!

OK, I've said my two cents, I've got it out of my system. I hope you can laugh at my little Holiday Carol 'bete noire'. Heck, maybe you've got your own Christmas song pet peeve and can relate.  I'd love to here about them.

I'll end this blog post with a little Drum Punchline